Is Your Glass Half Full or Half Empty?

Do you see the glass half empty or half full?  When you see the glass half empty it means that you have a pessimistic outlook, always expect the worst, and focus on the negative aspects of a situation. When you see the glass half full it means that you focus on the positive aspects of whatever is happening, and you probably have an optimistic perspective on things.  Saying the glass is half empty or half full are metaphors to describe how you interpret a situation, and whether you focus on what's missing or what's already there and will get better. We all have our own ways of approaching life.  Some people are more pessimistic and some more optimistic, and in today’s episode of Your Personal Power Pod we look at what might be your way and how to work with it.

We want to hear from you, whether it’s your stories about how self-esteem and personal power affect your life, or topics you’d like us to address in future episodes. 

We’d love for you to review our podcast. Do this on your streaming service or visit www.yourpersonalpowerpod.com , click Contact and drop us an email. 

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Also, if you’d like to make changes in your personal or business life, spending time with a coach can make all the difference.  Sandy is offering a free consultation, so contact her at sandy@insidejobscoach.com and put COACHING in the subject line to schedule a free call.

Thank you for listening to Your Personal Power Pod.  We look forward to hearing from you.

And, until next time, find your power and change your life!

Transcript

[00:00:00] Shannon: Welcome to your personal power pod, a podcast about aligning yourself with the life you want. And here are your hosts, Sandy Abel and Shannon Young.

[00:00:21] Sandy: Another cloudy day in the neighborhood. 

[00:00:24] Shannon: Hi, Sandy. It is very gloomy today, and it is also Election Day 2024, so depending on how you look at it, it could be gloomy all the way around. 

[00:00:34] Sandy: Or it could be great, and that's what we're talking about today. It's so appropriate. We're talking about, is your glass half empty or half full?

[00:00:46] Sandy: Yes. Which is so important. These are obviously metaphors. If you see the glass as half empty, it means that you have a pessimistic outlook, always expect the worst, and focus on the negative aspects of every [00:01:00] situation. But when you see the glass half full, it means that you focus on the positive aspects of whatever is happening, including elections and such, and you probably have an optimistic perspective on things.

[00:01:11] Shannon: Right. I've seen a meme floating around out there that says, thinking of the glass as half empty or half full misses the point. The point is the glass is refillable. 

[00:01:20] Sandy: That I like. See, now that's an optimistic point of view. That is a half full point of view. We all have our own ways of approaching life. So, today, we're going to look at that and see the pros and cons of each.

[00:01:35] Shannon: Yes, and I think it's important to clarify that there is no judgment here. We all think the way we think for a reason, and we just want to help you identify whether the way you're viewing things is beneficial to you. Is it making your life better, or is it making your life harder? So then, once you know, you can make choices about how you look at things.

[00:01:57] Shannon: Okay. 

[00:01:57] Sandy: Exactly. When you're [00:02:00] pessimistic, it means you expect negative outcomes and you focus more on what could go wrong. Like I asked somebody once, so is your glass half empty or half full? And he said, it doesn't matter. It's going to spill anyway. Oh no. Oh dear. 

[00:02:16] Shannon: That's a fun person to hang out with. Yeah.

[00:02:18] Sandy: Yeah. He was obviously not having fun in life at that point. 

[00:02:23] Shannon: And it would be interesting to know if he's always approached life that way or what happened that made that become his default. 

[00:02:32] Sandy: Yeah, we're gonna look at that because when you're optimistic, you always find the brighter side of things. You have hope and you expect good outcomes.

[00:02:41] Sandy: You and I, Shan, have learned that when we expect good things, amazingly, they show up, and it's really fun. But you got to be optimistic for that to happen. 

[00:02:51] Shannon: Yes. So let's talk a little bit about why we come to think one way or the other. 

[00:02:56] Sandy: Well, a lot of it goes way, way back, like you said. [00:03:00] Pessimism and optimism have deep roots.

[00:03:02] Sandy: They're often shaped by a combination of your life experiences, your upbringing, sometimes biological factors. Mm. If you grew up in a family that was always expecting the worst, you learn that life is hard and things don't work out. 

[00:03:16] Shannon: I think if you grew up in a family where things were unpredictable, you can go that way too.

[00:03:21] Sandy: Absolutely. Because you always have to be on guard and prepared and hyper vigilant. 

[00:03:26] Shannon: Right. Just always waiting for that second shoe to drop. 

[00:03:30] Sandy: I was talking to a young man the other day who was telling me all the great things that have happened to in his life in the last six months. I was like, Oh, wow, that's just awesome.

[00:03:40] Sandy: And he said, Yeah, but it's been too much good, so things are probably going to turn around now. 

[00:03:45] Shannon: That, I think, is a pretty common way of looking at good things. 

[00:03:49] Sandy: I know. And it's just so sad because why can't good things just keep coming? They do. if you expect them. And even if something does not go the way you [00:04:00] want it, it's all about how you choose to approach it and define it.

[00:04:03] Sandy: Is it going to stop you or is it going to just inspire you to find another way to get the good? 

[00:04:09] Shannon: Right. Good things and bad things are going to happen. That's just how life works. You're going to have both. But if you feed into the negative ones, They last longer. Oh my gosh. You give them a ton of attention and a ton of energy and a ton of thought.

[00:04:24] Shannon: Exactly. You just drag it out. 

[00:04:25] Sandy: You just perpetuate the negativity. But if you grew up in a household where challenges were seen as opportunities, you probably adopt it. optimistic mindset and look for and expect the good. 

[00:04:37] Shannon: It's not just the household you came from. You may have come from a very predictable, optimistic family, but then life could have smacked you down.

[00:04:46] Sandy: Exactly. If you had a series of setbacks, failed relationships, job losses, health struggles, you might have learned that life is hard and become really pessimistic. 

[00:04:56] Shannon: I think we start questioning The way we viewed [00:05:00] the world. I've been in situations like that, where my paradigm has been proven incorrect. And then it just leaves you feeling adrift.

[00:05:09] Shannon: And if you thought life was one way and life shows you, it's really not necessarily that way. It can take the wind out of your sails and then you stop. Trusting yourself and life and your decisions and your ability to move forward where once you saw life as beautiful and magical and wonderful all the time, it's not that way.

[00:05:31] Shannon: Then you kind of have to reframe your viewpoint and sometimes that's really hard. Sometimes it's really easy to just say, well, had the wind knocked out of me. Things aren't going the way I want them to. I thought things were this way, and they're not. So I guess life is just crap. And I mean, I know plenty of people who think that way.

[00:05:48] Sandy: I know. And then they just give up. And that's the problem with being pessimistic is you identify things that are going wrong as the way it's supposed to be and just accept it and say, Oh, well, that's the way it [00:06:00] goes. You know, the glass spilled. If you're optimistic, you Say, well, darn, I didn't expect that.

[00:06:06] Sandy: That didn't feel really good. What can I do about it? How can I move ahead? If you're pessimistic, you pretty much give it up. And if you're optimistic, you say, okay, I'll reboot. And find a new way. 

[00:06:20] Shannon: And then there's just our wiring. Some people's brains skew towards negativity. 

[00:06:25] Sandy: They do. And those people struggle with depression and have a more difficult time finding the good.

[00:06:32] Sandy: But they can do it. Sometimes they need a little medical help to do it. Sometimes it's just about shifting perspective. Taking it one step at a time, finding the things that are positive and making it be part of your life. 

[00:06:47] Shannon: So when we're talking about things like depression and anxiety, how do they play a role here?

[00:06:53] Sandy: Well, when you're depressed you have trouble finding the joy in anything. 

[00:06:57] Shannon: Yeah, 

[00:06:57] Sandy: obviously you become very [00:07:00] pessimistic. I know a young man who was dealing with depression for a long time. He actually had a good life, but it didn't turn out exactly the way he wanted it to. So he interpreted that to mean that he wasn't any good and it was never going to work out and started blaming everybody else.

[00:07:14] Sandy: And then he got illnesses related to that kind of negativity, digestive issues and all that. It just compounded. Eventually, I think he picked himself up and shook himself off and said, Wait a minute. My life does not have to be like this. I am going to find the good. And I think he was able to find a physician who was able to give him a nice antidepressant that worked for him.

[00:07:37] Sandy: And he changed his life situation. He's now finding the joy. 

[00:07:42] Shannon: That's awesome. It really comes down to taking control. It does. Your own thought processes. 

[00:07:46] Sandy: Exactly. And you have to be aware that you're going down that negative pessimistic rabbit hole so that you can stop yourself, catch yourself before you hit the bottom.

[00:07:56] Sandy: Sometimes you have to hit the bottom and that'll wake you up. [00:08:00] They always say that for folks who are dealing with addiction of some kind that you have to get to the worst place you can get and still survive, and maybe you'll look at it then and say, wait a minute, this is not the right road to take. And then they become more optimistic and positive and say, okay, I'm going to climb out and I'm going to make good things happen.

[00:08:19] Sandy: And it is a choice. 

[00:08:20] Shannon: And I don't want it to sound like we're saying being optimistic is ignoring or pretending, because that's not what we're saying at all. There are challenges in life and sometimes it comes down to acknowledging what's going on and then choosing to see the bright side anyway, or planning for the worst but expecting the best.

[00:08:38] Sandy: Exactly. Like you said, good things and bad things always happen. Some you can control and some you can't control, and it's all about how you choose to deal with them. If you're optimistic, you might tackle them. faster and in a more positive way than if you're pessimistic, but you still have the power.

[00:08:54] Shannon: Always. So how do we do that? 

[00:08:57] Sandy: Well, the important thing is to know that [00:09:00] while some of these things are outside your control, you have the power to shift your mindset. We've talked about mindset a lot. Question your thoughts. Ask yourself, is this really true? Like the young man I was talking about who was saying that, you know, there's been a lot of good so I'm expecting bad now.

[00:09:16] Sandy: He needs to question that. Like, why? Why would I be expecting that? Everything's going great. What evidence do I have for this thought? 

[00:09:23] Shannon: Also, shifting what you're focusing on. If you're just focusing on the things that are causing you stress or anxiety or that are out of your control, Bring it in closer, start paying attention to the things right here, right now that you're grateful for.

[00:09:38] Shannon: I really love these socks, you know, these socks just make my feet feel like they're being hugged all day long. It's silly, but it's not silly. It's huge. It affects everything in your life if you can start being grateful for the little things. 

[00:09:51] Sandy: Gratitude is so powerful. It makes such a difference and we've talked about that a lot.

[00:09:56] Sandy: I like to take my daily walks and, oh, this time of year the trees [00:10:00] are so gorgeous. I just focus on that and leave whatever I left in the office, in the office and whatever the struggles or challenges are and just go out and appreciate, listen to the birds, find the joy because it's always there if you choose to find it.

[00:10:15] Shannon: And it's really helpful to write them down. I know this is a practice that, you know, Maybe you're not really wanting to cultivate, but I have found over the years that the few minutes it takes me to just write down at the end of the day, three or four things that I'm really grateful for, or that I noticed, or that were beautiful, or that touched me somehow.

[00:10:33] Shannon: Today, if I'm in a bad place, going back and reading through that is really powerful. 

[00:10:39] Sandy: Absolutely. And also starting your day like that. 

[00:10:42] Shannon: Every 

[00:10:43] Sandy: morning, your dad and I, before we even get out of bed, we talk about what we're grateful for and all the good that's going to happen that day. Oh, that's sweet. It sets the tone for a really positive day.

[00:10:56] Sandy: Usually, they go that way, and if they don't, we go, Oh, well, [00:11:00] we'll just work with that and work around it and change the situation or reframe it, looking for the silver lining in a difficult situation. 

[00:11:08] Shannon: I think reframing is really key here because you can think something bad has happened. Say you lost your job, and yeah, in the moment, it's a big deal.

[00:11:17] Shannon: It's a big shift. There's grief involved. It's going to require making changes, but at the same time, It could lead to something better. You know, it could lead to a new opportunity. 

[00:11:27] Sandy: And often does if a relationship breaks up, there's a reason that it broke up. And even if you're not real clear on that, there's something or somebody out there that is better match for you.

[00:11:38] Shannon: Or even it could be the same person. I'm not saying start focusing on that. I'm saying do the work that you need to to grow and evolve and it is entirely possible that that relationship might be salvaged. Yeah. So you never know. Keep your options open. Learn what you need to learn from whatever the situation is.

[00:11:56] Shannon: It's really easy to get stuck in self defeating behaviors [00:12:00] or anger, especially if you've been let go from a job. But the more you buy into that, the less likely it is that you're going to come out of it in a better space. 

[00:12:09] Sandy: So you've got to find a way to see the potential upside of everything that happens.

[00:12:15] Sandy: Whether you're a pessimist or an optimist, self compassion is the key. You have to be able to love yourself and appreciate who you are. We talk about being gentle with yourself all the time, and that is so important when you're dealing with situations that are a challenge. 

[00:12:33] Shannon: I think part of pessimism comes from not really having faith in your ability to handle things.

[00:12:42] Shannon: Mm hmm. So if you can be your own support system, I've got this. This sucks, and I didn't want to be here, but I'm here and I can totally get out of it. 

[00:12:52] Sandy: And if you don't have that capability, talk to a trusted friend or a family member or even a counselor or a [00:13:00] coach and get that boost that you need. Get that reminder that you are a strong, powerful, capable, competent person.

[00:13:06] Sandy: You always have the ability to rise above whatever is happening. I think of. the people who were in concentration camps. I heard an amazing man talk about his experience being in a concentration camp. He was an army soldier who had been shot down over Germany and was in a camp. He said the people who survived were the ones who were able to band together in whatever way they could, find their inner strength.

[00:13:33] Sandy: Like they used to play tricks on the guards and stuff. That's right. That could have gotten them in a whole lot of trouble, but it gave them a sense of power and strength and unity. And he came out of that concentration camp feeling much stronger and more secure in who he was. He said a lot of people didn't do that.

[00:13:52] Sandy: They just said, Oh, well, we're in a concentration camp, we're going to die. And they did. It's all about how you approach it. [00:14:00] Are you optimistic or pessimistic? Do you find the good or do you find what's not going to work? 

[00:14:05] Shannon: And keeping a sense of humor, I think, is key. Yes. If you can get some levity into the situation, that can be really helpful.

[00:14:11] Sandy: Always. Finding the joy and the levity. That affects your body chemistry. It 

[00:14:16] Shannon: does. It 

[00:14:17] Sandy: releases your endorphins and then that just builds on itself. If you're tending to be pessimistic and looking for the negative, you might want to pay attention to yourself. Notice what you're doing without judgment. Don't judge yourself.

[00:14:31] Sandy: Just say, Oh, you know, I always look for the bad. I wonder why I do that. My dad always did that. He kept getting fired from his jobs and, but that's not me. Does that apply to me? And maybe it doesn't. Who do I want to be? 

[00:14:44] Shannon: Yeah, and it's okay to let yourself feel what you're feeling. We're not saying stuff your emotions.

[00:14:50] Shannon: Sometimes before you can move forward, you have to feel them and let them go. So feel them and let them go and remember that you can't always trust what you're thinking. You kind of [00:15:00] gotta engage in some realistic thinking. If you're catastrophizing, maybe let's start bringing things back to this moment.

[00:15:08] Shannon: And okay, are you actually safe in this moment? And what can you control? 

[00:15:13] Sandy: And then go with that and you will find your way out of just about everything. And appreciate the good days. Remember that everyone has tough days, so always be gentle with yourself. 

[00:15:24] Shannon: Yeah, we can be really hard on ourselves. It's sad and detrimental.

[00:15:29] Sandy: It's unnecessary, really. And the most important first step is noticing that you're doing it. And then the second is deciding to take control and make a change. 

[00:15:39] Shannon: It's about balance. It's 

[00:15:41] Sandy: always about balance. Balance. Optimism is great, but you don't want it to make you ignore the reality of difficult situations.

[00:15:48] Sandy: You have to make sure that pessimism doesn't get you stuck in a loop of negativity that prevents you from seeing any light. Awareness is the first step, and with time, you can build the mindset that serves you [00:16:00] best. Remember that you always have the power to choose if you see your glass half empty or half full, and what you choose will determine how your life unfolds.

[00:16:09] Shannon: Thank you, Mama. 

[00:16:10] Sandy: And thank you, Shannon, and thank you to our listeners. And we want to let you know today's episode, our 130th, and the final episode of Season 5. 

[00:16:22] Shannon: Woohoo! 

[00:16:23] Sandy: Woohoo! So we will, we will be taking a few weeks off for the holidays and such. During that time, we will provide you with other fun things to listen to, and we will come back in early January with a whole new season and lots of new episodes of your personal power pod.

[00:16:44] Shannon: Really looking forward to it. And if you would like a say in the things we talk about, send us your ideas. We love it when you tell us what's on your mind that helps us deliver the kind of content that you're interested in. So please send us an email or comment on our YouTube page if you want to do that there.

[00:16:59] Shannon: [00:17:00] Also, if you want to tell us your stories about self esteem and personal power and how they've affected your life. We really enjoy that. It's really cool to see what has made a difference in your world and how you are better for it. And if you just want to chat with us, go ahead and visit us at yourpersonalpowerpod.

[00:17:15] Shannon: com click contact and drop us an email. We look forward to hearing from you and until next time, find your power and change your life.